Slow, Simple, Surrendered

The Lord knew exactly what He was doing when He impressed the word Savor upon my heart at the beginning of this year. He saw the big picture. He knew what my heart was going to be longing for.

We’ve been homeschooling for exactly one month and I can’t shake the feeling that He’s calling me to a slower, simpler, more surrendered life.

Slow days of sight words in our pajamas.

Simple school lessons that include monster trucks.

Jackson thrives in calm, quiet spaces. He prefers to be with a few trusted people. Forget about chaotic spaces with lots of people. He would rather stay at home then run from place to place (unless you tempt him with a toy store visit).

I sort of knew these things about my son, but it wasn’t until we pulled him from public school that God opened my eyes to see just how much my son craves calm and quiet. Slow and simple.

I can clearly see why public school wasn’t working – it was constant chaos.

The noises, transitions and overwhelming amount of people were too much for my kiddo to handle.

Over the past few weeks, as I’ve surrendered to God’s plan and embraced how He created Jackson, I’m finding that my soul craves the calm, quiet spaces, too. I want more of it.

I’m choosing to stay home instead of rushing around.

I savor the white space on my calendar and I don’t feel the need to fill it.

Ephesians 2:1 says: You let the world, which doesn’t know the first thing about living tell you how to live.

I lived my life based on what the world said I needed to do.

I was so worried about missing out.

I rushed.

I strived.

I wanted bigger.

I thought I needed to be busier.

I was a hurry-up-and-get-it-done and prove my worth Type-A person.

I’m exhausted just typing that!

But this past month – though it’s been scary – has been absolutely freeing!

God is having to reshape my way of thinking.

He’s pruning away parts of me that are too uptight and too worried about what the world says.

He’s teaching me it’s okay to have a small, simple life.

It’s okay if the blog post doesn’t get written.

It’s okay if a few Facebook followers fall off the face of cyber earth.

It’s okay to book fewer photo sessions.

It’s okay to kick back and read a book while Jackson plays in the backyard.

It’s okay to order pizza for dinner.

It’s okay to let the laundry wait another day.

It’s okay to teach sight words while waiting for speech therapy.

It’s okay to go against what the world says is good, in order to find something great. 

God knew I would crave slow, simple, surrendered days.

He knew I would want to Savor them.