I’d be interested to know how many hours of sleep I’ve lost during these first 2.5 years of motherhood.
The sleep deprivation and the long nights were a new mother’s worst nightmare.
I like sleep. A lot.
There were nights so fog-filled with desperation. I just wanted to sleep. My son just wanted to scream.
Now in our toddler years, those horrible nights are still ingrained in my mind. The mere thought of them makes me cringe at the thought of having a newborn again.
Colic has scarred me for life.
And although he’s been sleeping through the night for quite some time now, there are still nights when he decides he needs to party at 2 a.m.
The good news about theses parties is there’s no screaming involved and I can doze on the couch while he watches cartoons.
Just last night John and I watched Chuggington with Jackson at 2 a.m. He was wound up until 4:00 a.m.
One thing’s for sure, we handle the middle of the night much better with a toddler than we did with a newborn.
While that newborn stage was rough for the three of us, I’ve found myself getting sentimental lately as I’ve looked back through photos of Jackson’s first year.
Precious moments highjacked by colic.
Those early days lost; never to be relived.
Realizing sleep deprivation and stress caused me to miss out on a lot of joy. I was in survival mode. I didn’t think I’d survive that first year.
Now 2.5 years have gone by.
I’d give anything for one day of a onesie wearing, bottle taking, rock him to sleep moment.
Minus the colic.
In the midst of the chaos it seemed I would never survive it, but here we are.
The colic subsided.
He started sleeping through the night.
Our days aren’t as challenging.
We have fun and make memories and the tantrums are few and far between.
Slowly (but somewhat quickly) the baby is dissappering right before my eyes.
When I look at him at 2 a.m., I see a little boy.
***Today I’m linking up for Five Minute Friday with Lisa-Jo. Join the fun here.
I, too, remember those sleepless nights. My daughter was very similar and I look back now that she is 6 and while I love the amazing person she is now, I miss that baby and toddler.
Courtney –
It’s bittersweet, isn’t it! It really does go by so fast!
Thanks for stopping by my blog today!
I so needed to hear these words today. My oldest will be three in September and I miss those baby days with her. I now have a three-week old and am back full force into sleep deprivation. I don’t want to miss out on the joys of my newborn daughter because I am just trying to survive. I will be enjoying the sweet, joy-filled moments more I hope this time around.
Melissa –
I pray this time around is a little easier than the first 🙂
It’s so hard to not live in survive mode those first few months. Nobody can prepare you for that season 🙂
Oh, I shouldn’t have read this! My oldest baby is turning 12 in less than a month. We had lots of fun with colic too. My middle baby is 8 and growing up way to fast. My “baby” baby is 4 going on 14. He wants to be so big too soon and I can’t stand it. All he wants is to be 5 (not sure why, but for two years he has wanted to be 5). I miss the days of onsies and late night rocking too. But hey, we get in lots of Caillou just so we can go to bed these days! When my oldest was a toddler, we would put him in our bed with a movie on just so we could sleep. He would wake us up in the middle night to get us to rewind the movie!
I remember the days when mine were young. I needed so much grace, and mine didn’t have colic. Those years fly by so fast. My oldest is married! Stopped over from the Five Minute Friday!